Let Me In
by CasualtyClare
Summary: When Sam gets some news that changes her life, she slowly begins to spiral out of control, pushing away everyone who tries to help. Will Tom be able to salvage their relationship and help her get through it? Please R
1. Chapter 1

**So... I wanted to start a new one because I've had this summary on my iPod for weeks and it's been bugging me to do something with it. I warn you this isn't going to be a happy FanFic, but the first chapter is fine... It'll probably be a bit different to my other ones.**

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**Chapter 1**

Sam opened the door to her house laughing at what Tom had just said, as he swiftly followed her in, laughing too, and shutting the door behind him, sliding the chain across the bar. He slipped his shoes off and dropped his bag, and followed her into the kitchen, continuing their conversation.

'Definitely Noel and Louise; perfect couple.' He grinned to himself and switched the kettle on as he walked past it, out of habit. She sniggered a little at his comment and grabbed two mugs off of the side having been washed up. She then walked over to the freezer and scanned the shelves briefly, before pulling out a frozen pizza, checking the cooking times and then turning on the oven.

'Pizza's good, yes?' She flashed a smile at him from across the room, as he made two cups of coffee for them.

'Pizza's fine.' He spoke with a small smile, and carried the coffee over to her. She took it from his grasp and held it with both hands, taking a few sips, then placing it on the work top beside her.

'What's on TV tonight? It's Wednesday so that means... nothing.' She rolled her eyes.

'Oh well... We'll have to find something else to do...' He grinned to himself before placing his coffee next to hers and glancing across the room. 'Oven's ready.' He walked over and put the pizza in, turning the dial after he shut the door.

A while later after chatting, the pizza was ready and they sat down to eat at the kitchen table, and as the meal was finished, Sam stood up and spoke.

'You can do the washing up today... You're always on drying duty.' She grinned at him, raising an eyebrow.

'That is so not true...' He tried to stop himself from grinning too.

'You can't get out of it this time.' She walked across the room then back, throwing a wet cloth at him. He grimaced and whinged something about it not being fair, but eventually he got up and did it. She dried as he did so and as she was putting away the last plate, she felt his arms wrapping around her waist from behind, enclosing her in his hold, as she leant her head back into his chest. He breathed in heavily as a grin appeared on his face and simultaneously she smiled to herself. He kissed her hair lightly before letting go, and she turned around to face him.

'What was that for?' She looked directly into his eyes.

'Oh I don't know... It seemed like a good time.' He grinned and began to lean in. She copied his movements, leaning towards him, but their lips were interrupted by the phone ringing. She immediately stepped back with a smile and walked out of the room and answered the phone. Just minutes later she walked back into the room, a look of shock on her face.

'Sam what is it?' He asked anxiously, immediately walking over to her.

'My dad... He...' She couldn't get the words out.

'What's happened?!' He placed a hand on her arm as a sign of comfort.

'That was my mum... He's been in a car crash... He... He's not conscious...' Slowly she felt a tear drop from her eye and land on her cheek, and she quickly wiped it away.

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**The next chapter will definitely be up tomorrow, as they're not very long, and I've nearly finished it now. Thank you so much for reading and I appreciate all reviews! So, until tomorrow readers... Sorry about the long gap since a last update. I would say I've been busy but I haven't. Good luck for any fellow GCSE students getting results this Thursday too!**


	2. Chapter 2

**I think this one's longer... I don't even know. Enjoy this as much as you can... It's not very happy but... Anyway, I did say it would be up 'tomorrow' and it's technically tomorrow, as it's after midnight so... There may be another one on the way soon, or at least when I wake up tomorrow morning, but whenever it is, it won't be long. Thanks to my first reviewer! It made me smile so much :)**

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Chapter 2

Tom immediately stepped closer.

'Come here.' He wrapped his arms around her as she rested her head against his chest, and quickly she felt tears pour from her eyes, holding him tighter as her rested his chin on the top of her head.

Soon she wiped away her tears and Tom offered to drive her to the hospital; luckily he'd been taken to Holby.

As they pulled up in the visitor's car park, Sam quickly checked herself in the mirror, making sure she didn't look like she'd been crying, and Tom watched her do this.

He got out and quickly ran round, opening the door for her, and took her hand as she climbed out of the car. Locking it behind him, they walked into the front of the E.D, passing a confused Jamie on the way in.

'Tom? What are you guys doing here? I'm pretty sure you're not working?'

Tom looked at Sam before he replied,

'Yeah we're here for... personal reasons.'

'Oh right, I hope everything's okay.' Jamie spoke with a calming smile before walking off to cubicles.

Tom took Sam by the hand across to Noel, asking for her where her dad was.

'Richard Nicholls? He's been admitted.'

'Through there.' Noel gestured to resus with a slight smile, although secretly worried, having seen the man being brought in.

Sam walked in front of Tom opening the doors to resus, walking straight in to see her mother standing by the side of a bed surrounded by doctors.

'Mum... Is he?' Sam's throat tightened as she swallowed a gulp down it, and she felt her eyes filling, so she stopped herself from talking. She felt Tom's hand grab a hold of hers as he stood behind her.

'He's not responsive Sam...' Sam's mother managed to sniffle out, placing an arm around her, as Sam let go of Tom's hand to hug her tightly. Sam wiped a tear from her from her eye as she pulled away from the hug, walking up closer to the bed.

'Ash, what's happening?' She choked out, raising a hand to her head, pushing her hair out of her face.

'I... It's probably best you stay back Sam...' He turned around giving her a kind smile, but not a reassuring one.

Sam took a slow step backwards, and as she did so, she caught a glimpse of her father's face. She was used to seeing patients with lines in, intubated, completely unconscious, but seeing such a familiar face in that position really hit her. Before she could look at him for longer than a minute, machines began to beep around her, making her jump, as she could feel her hands shaking violently and her breathing got much faster. Doctors and nurses she knew all too well were crowded around the bed, around her own father. She didn't know what to do with herself, her head was pounding to the sound of the machines beeping. She glanced around the room to see Tom looking at her worried, only about a metre away, then continued to see her mother in tears, Tess comforting her and trying to get her to come away from the bed.

'Clear!'

Her thoughts were immediately interrupted. Her head sharply turned to Ash, who was placing defibrillator paddles on her father's chest. His lifeless body gave way on the bed as the shock passed through him; the beeping still continued.

'Okay and again. Clear!'

Sam couldn't help but let the tears fall from her eyes this time, her fingers stiffened into a fist as Ash was about to shock him again. Another wave of electricity passed through her father, but still nothing. Nothing at all. Sam backed away slowly from the bed, Tom watching her intently, as she finally managed to peel her gaze away from the bed, and onto Tom. He swiftly moved in to hug her and she wrapped her arms around him, as she burst into tears.

'Time of death, 18:48,' She heard faintly in the background, as she gripped onto Tom tighter, shutting her eyes, and wishing she could just block out the entire world in his arms.

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**I don't know about you but I'm quite emotional, but that's probably because I'm already writing Chapter 3 and planning Chapter 4... My Mum isn't particularly happy with me staying up late writing but... Who cares. Thank you so much for reading! Please R&R. Laters alligators.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Enjoy! Thanks for the amazing reviews! **

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Chapter 3

Tom had taken Sam to the relatives room, with her mother, where the three of them had sat for quite a while before Tom decided to get up and talk to Ash about what had happened. He was heading to resus when he saw him standing by reception talking to Louise. Ash turned and spoke first.

'How are they?' He gave Tom a dismayed look.

'I'd be lying if I said they were okay...' He sighed. 'What happened exactly? I'm a bit behind.'

'Well the knife went straight throught the rib cage and into the lung... He didn't have much chance really. He was quite unfortunate.' Ash spoke with a casual tone.

'Knife?!' Tom spoke loudly, then realised he should probably lower his voice. 'I was told it was a car crash?'

'No, definitely a knife.' Ash looked confused. 'It was a burglary apparently; he tried to stop the guy and ended up on the fatal brunt of it all.'

'Sam definitely said car crash on the phone... She said... Her mum said car crash.' Tom ran his hand through his already messy hair, and before Ash could speak again, he'd walked off.

He returned to the relative's room, but could only see Sam inside, so quickly avoided passing the window and walked off in the opposite direction to find her mother.

He noticed her across the E.D exiting the toilets, and quickly hurried up to her.

'Mrs Nicholls, how are you?' He asked politely.

'I'm... I'm better thanks.' She stammered out. 'Still in shock I think...'

'I'm not surprised.' He slowly tried to edge the conversation to where he wanted. 'Forgive me if you'd rather not talk about it, but what happened exactly? I'm a bit behind in all this you see.' He slowly gestured as they walked for her to take a seat in the open reception area, and she followed where his hand pointed and did so, and he was about to sit down beside her, when he spoke.

'Would you like a coffee?'

'Yes thank you, it would help.' She replied with a smile.

Tom fetched them two coffees and carried them back slowly.

'So, what happened exactly?' He spoke with a warm smile, hoping she would open up to him.

'I'm not sure exactly...' She replied with quite a vacant look on her face, not making any eye contact with Tom.

'I just got a call saying he'd been in a car crash and taken to Holby ED.' She continued on still.

'It was all such a shock, I didn't think to ask how he crashed...' She began to get flustered and panicky, and Tom soon thought to stop her from going on, before she got out of control.

'It's fine, you don't have to say anymore.' He stood up with a fake but believable smile and walked out of view from both her and the staff. He sighed deeply, slightly confused, but more worried about what was going on, and leant his head against the wall, a frown evident on his face.

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**I promised it would be up today and it is still technically today on my watch ;) Please R&R!**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Tom didn't have a clue of what to do. Should he tell Sam the truth, or tell her mother he knew the truth? But what if Ash was wrong, he didn't want to make any accusations like that.

Tom jumped out of his skin, and out of his thoughts, as he felt a hand on his arm. He turned to see Sam putting on a brave face, looking straight up at him. With his best fake smile he put a hand on her back and asked how she was.

'As good as I can be...' She spoke softly, as they headed back to the relatives room. 'Where did you get off to?' She asked with a suspicious tone in her voice.

Tom paused slightly before he spoke.

'I went to talk to Ash about what happened...'

'What did happen?' She asked, oblivious.

'I...' He was stuck of what to say.

'Apparently he was knocked off the road into a ditch by a lorry, it was fatal, there was nothing they could do.' He spoke with a noticeable stutter in places.

Sam didn't answer, turning her head away as he opened the door to the relative's room for her, as she walked in and sat back where she was before.

'Drink?' He shattered the silence immediately.

'No thanks. I couldn't right now...' She made no eye contact with him.

'Sam are you sure you're okay?' He asked getting more and more concerned.

'Fine. I'm fine Tom. I don't suppose you could give me some space actually?' She spoke bluntly.

'Yeah... sure...' He backed out of the relatives room.

Sam didn't mean to be rude, but she hated people seeing her emotional. She couldn't open to Tom any more than anyone else, it wasn't her.

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**Shortest chapter yet, but there'll be one up this evening ;) Thanks for the reviews!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Right, it's not that long, but it's quite a big chapter in terms of storyline... I would say that if anyone is particularly squeamish, it's not the best thing to read. Please keep reviewing!**

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Chapter 5

Tom walked out into the main reception when he saw Sam's mother walking out of the E.D doors. Quickly he sprinted to catch up with her outside.

'Mrs Nicholls?' He spoke slightly out of breath.

'Tom. I can't stand hospitals, I just needed some air.' She replied innocently. 'And you can call me Sandra.'

'Sandra, I need to talk to you about something...' He replied nervously, stretching his neck from side to side.

She stared at him blankly.

'I have accounts from Doctor Ashford... The doctor that was treating your husband, that... That Richard didn't die in a car crash...' Tom's stomach knotted tightly as nerves came over him in preparation for her reply.

'No... no don't say that, he did...' She spluttered out at him. 'What did the doctor say to you?'

Tom sighed to himself, wishing he hadn't said anything.

'I know that he wasn't in a car crash Sandra... He was stabbed. And I think you know who...'

'Leave me alone...' She spoke loudly but not angrily.

As she walked away he grabbed her arm.

'I won't tell Sam... Please just tell me what happened.'

'Okay... I'd just woken up after falling asleep on the sofa...' She began.

*FLASHBACK*

_As Sandra stirred and her eyelids flickered, she noticed the bright living room lights were on, causing her to strain her eyes. She propped herself up with her arms and stepped off of the sofa. She slowly walked towards the kitchen, in a bit of a tired daze. She was about to walk through the doorway when she saw Richard at the other end of the room, facing the opposite direction. She followed his hand, which was in front of him, out of her sight. He turned slightly and revealed a sharp knife in his hand._

_Immediately she took a rapid step backwards, making no noise, but in shock, and when out of hearing range, ran up the stairs and sat on her bedroom floor against the shut door, head in knees and crying._

_That was it, he was coming for her, he was sure of it. They argued frequently but she never thought it would come to this. What if he came upstairs? Forced the door open? He was much stronger than her, she had no chance. And with a knife... As she grew more and more stressed and panicky, she suddenly heard a loud groan from downstairs, and then she realised._

_She ran down the stairs quickly, breathless, to see exactly what she expected. Richard was lying on the floor, knife in his chest, in his own blood._

*PRESENT*

Sandra was in floods of tears. Tom was absolutely shocked. He pulled her towards him comfortingly, as she cried more and more.

'Please Tom... I'm only protecting Sam... She can't know this...'

'I understand...' He replied so faint you could barely hear it.

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**Okay I'm just running out of things to say here, and there'll definitely be another chapter up tomorrow. Hope you enjoyed it! There's even more drama to come, believe it or not.**


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